"You're the first ethnic person I've met."
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Perspectives
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"YOU'RE THE FIRST ETHNIC PERSON I'VE MET."
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Words by Shahed Ezaydi
Artwork by Javie Huxley
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‘You’re the first ethnic person I’ve met’. This is the opening sentence I had from someone I had just met at a party during fresher’s week. The usual small talk questions were ‘where are you from?’ and ‘what are you studying?’ Yet this person, with their Dutch courage, decided to dive straight into my ethnic background and why I’m brown. Now, I didn’t exactly go to university at some far and secluded place where no person of colour (PoC) dared to go. I went to university in Manchester, a large Northern city known for its diversity and multi-culturalism. I just assumed, albeit naively, that my race and ethnic background wouldn’t really be commented on there. But here I was stood with this person, aged 18, trying to figure out how I should react to their statement and what I could possibly say. Thanks? Do I ignore it and just ask them what they’re studying? Do I make a joke out of it? I mean, humour was usually my go-to defence mechanism. No, I decided to press them on it and responded ‘oh wow, where did you grow up then?’ Turns out they grew up in some very small rural village in the South, which was all white. Fuelled by my initial stunned reaction to their statement, the conversation quickly became them trying to justify why they had never met a PoC. ‘Oh don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched plenty of TV and film with people of colour in it. I just have never met anyone like you in reality.’ I am able to recall this conversation so clearly because it really has stuck in my memory.
In my mind at the time, this vision of living in a tiny isolated white bubble pretty much explained why they had never met a PoC. I mean, how could they if everybody who lived in the area was white? Or if they’d never ventured to a city until now? However, looking back on it now, I can’t quite believe that there are still people in the UK that have never met or spoken to a PoC. We pride ourselves on being a nation of diversity and multi-culturalism, but there are people living here that only see this diversity and multi-culturalism on their TV screens or in newspapers. And of course, even those aren’t exactly true representations of PoC due to the whole other issue of racial stereotyping. It is truly mind blowing. But is it just shocking to me because I grew up in a city, and went to school with people of different backgrounds? I’m not entirely sure.
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"A POC IS NOT PRESENT TO SIMPLY EDUCATE OTHERS. WE LIVE IN AN AGE WHERE LITERALLY ALL MANNERS OF INFORMATION AND KNOWLEDGE ARE AVAILABLE ONLINE THROUGH A FEW CLICKS."
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Then the same thing that always happens happened. I was assigned the title of ‘PoC representative’ for this conversation, and the person proceeded to reel off all manner of questions, that I think they must have had bottled up for a while. I was assumed to be this all-knowing beacon of knowledge for all races and ethnicities. In that moment, I was held accountable for all. It was on me to teach and educate this person on all things race in minutes. I was polite and tried to answer some of these questions, but I was 18 and in my fresher’s week, so I entertained this conversation for as long as I could and then excused myself. A PoC is not present to simply educate others. We live in an age where literally all manners of information and knowledge are available online through a few clicks. If someone really wanted to learn more about the Windrush generation or why Muslim women wear a headscarf or what languages are spoken in Pakistan - they can simply Google it. Unless it’s a personal story, I am not solely responsible for teaching people about race or culture, especially at a party. I was just a fresher at a party wanting to meet new people and have fun, and I ended up being a teacher for 15 minutes!
I don’t blame that person for anything or think badly of them, as they weren’t malicious or rude. They were just an intoxicated individual who decided to voice their curiosity upon meeting me at a party. However, it does speak to how far we still need to go as a nation. Are we truly diverse? If that person hadn’t left their village to go to university, and if they had stayed, could they have gone their whole life without meeting anyone who was different to them? It’s a scary thought.
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READ MORE
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CONTEMPORARY CONVERSATIONS
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